Thinking about having a child or starting family planning? Wondering what to consider, how to evaluate and decide? Please read on.

Factors to Consider for Family Planning:

• Are you Physically and Mentally Ready?
• Are your Finances and Support Systems Ready?
• Do you have a good understanding of child development and needs?
• Needs as per Maslow’s Hierarchy
• Importance of Parental Care

Are you Physically and Mentally Ready?

We all probably have an idea about how children develop physically. It is very rarely that we are educated about how they develop mentally and psychologically.

A human starts developing in the mother’s womb. As per science, development of nervous system and other organs could start between third and eighth week of pregnancy. As such, genetics of parents, misuse of drugs/smoking/ alcohol by parents (especially by a pregnant mother), lack of necessary nutrition for mother, issues in the family, etc., can impact the little human within.

While some of these are unavoidable (like genetic issues), most of the other issues can be handled by preparing the parents for child birth. Educate yourselves about how child development happens in the womb and after the child is born. So as a first step in family planning, check if you are prepared to handle the mental and physical changes and challenges as a family.

Are your Finances and Support Systems Ready?

It is also important for prospective parents to consider factors like finance, family structure/ support and several other factors before they do family planning. A lot of married couples decide to have kids because of peer/ societal pressure. They do not really evaluate their readiness many a times.

Very often couples decide to have a second or third kid because of the same reason – peer/ societal pressure. If you give in to such pressure and have more kids than you can provide for, you are jeopardizing your kids’ future. Only you can evaluate whether you are financially ready to have one, two or three kids. Family members and friends will never be able to help you with that, neither would you want to involve them in such matters.

Do you have a good understanding of child development and needs?

Understand about child development (both physiological and psychological) from a family counsellor or doctor. This should ideally be done well before you start planning for a kid. Understand the intricacies and compromises that will have to be made by both parents. Think clearly if you are ready for a child or want to take the plunge at a later stage. This way we can provide a conducive environment for our children to grow and thrive. Our maturity as parents can be the best base for a child to develop and do well in life.

Childcare is not just about providing the basic needs like food, water, clothing, shelter, etc. As per Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, these are just the basic physiological needs of a human. Of course, the first factors you must consider while evaluating your choice of having a kid is whether you can fulfill these basic needs. If no, prepare yourself and then plan for a kid when you feel ready. Then there are cases where pregnancy happens by accident. These are exceptions where the parents will have to take additional guidance to plan accordingly.

Needs as per Maslow’s Hierarchy

In addition to the basic physiological needs mentioned above there are needs like safety and security (health, finance); love and belongingness; self-esteem needs and self-actualization needs. When parents are able to satisfy the basic physiological, safety and belongingness needs of a child, this will prepare the child to handle these needs well themselves as they grow older.

For instance, a child who has been loved and treated well by parents/ caretakers will be more comfortable in life, social, confident, have better self-esteem and tend to be more self-aware. They will not depend on others for appreciation and will be able to fulfill their potential. In case of children who lose their parents at some point of time, their caretakers/ teachers could help satisfy these needs for them.

As per Maslow, self actualization is the only need that motivates us to keep at it as we grow. As for the other needs, our motivation decreases as those needs are met. Ideally once you have enough food, water, shelter, clothing, safety and security, your motivation to have still more would decrease. Again, there might be exceptions but we are referring to the ideal case here.

So do you have enough time, interest and patience to invest in your growing family and kids?

Importance of Parental Care & Family Planning

We have to prepare our kids to fulfill their needs on their own as they grow up. There are several theories about child development. You will be amazed to know that parental care plays a pivotal role in most of them. When you talk about parental care, it could also be from other caregivers like teachers, extended family, etc.

So evaluate your resources – think how much and how well you can provide for your child. Plan accordingly. Be confident when you tell your nagging aunties and uncles that you have it all taken care of.

Happy planning!

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